“Even the Declaration of Independence only guaranties life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. It doesn’t say anything about fair. Doesn’t even say you have the right to be happy - just to pursue it.”—Straight Talk (via filmquotes)
“You’re going to come across people in your life who will say all the right words at all the right times. But in the end, it’s always their actions you should judge them by. It’s actions, not words, that matter.”—
so today i was cleaning my room and i had a huge pile of stuff to throw out or give away. and while i was sorting through it, i felt so silly for wanting those things so badly when i was younger. for example: 4+ diaries? who was i kidding. and then i came upon this hello kitty box thing that brought back a whole new memory. i got it from my best friend joann for a dollar and then she wanted it back after like a week butt i was a mean kid and told her a deal’s a deal. oh and i also found a whole bunch of neopet posters and a mary kate and ashley one. ah i felt so dumb looking at them. i cant believe i used to be so obsessed with neopets and hello kitty and sanrio and stationary etc. and then i told my mom i felt so stupid making her buy me all this stuff and i expected her to agree butt instead she said “well it made you happy.”
so now i have a whole shopping bag full of stuff to give away and even though i feel sad because it feels like im letting go a part of my childhood, i also feel good about myself because im gonna make some other little girl happy.
boy, its been weeks since we’ve talked. im so glad i decided to go to kumon that one year instead of regina CAUSE I MET YOU. i remember one day everyone was saying where they were going for jhs and i was like why is no one saying mcauliffeee. then you said those magical words only to let me down by saying “global.” but its all good cause we still became amazing friends. i remember we had zero contact for quite a while though. then you suddenly im’ed me and it was all spectacular from there on. and over the years we’ve both changed a lot, looks wise and emotionally [wise]. i remember when you used to be my height and how you wore echo. but when i look at you now i see a dude whos taller than me and who wears cardigans. what a change! oh and you have such great music now and i love your iphone and how we live near each other. but i might move soon and we wont be able to walk everywhere together. damn and i was all happy about the possibility of moving until just now. ah and you can play guitar now or youre learning. what happened to that short clarinetist friend of mine. not that youre not any cooler now butt its mad weird how much we’ve grown. LALlalalaa back to aim (:
so far nothing has gone as planned or imagined BUTT its not too terrible either. i guess next summer is the summer. gah and im still white as a marshmellow. butt theres still some summer left to tan and have funn yay. ah and fencing was so much fun but maddd tiring. but the lady lied. “oh i understand how stuy guys are, dont worry there are many cute guys here.” validness: close to nothing. cept for one exception. omgsh and ive learned not to rely on facebook. such a dumb thing cause people sometimes look different in real life as compared to their fb pics. i hope i wont be labeled as the hypocrite now. in books set in high school theres always such a huge emphasis on cliques and labels and i never thought it was real but it is. and its beyond stupid. and the people who label and judge and criticize others, youre really no better than the ones you talk crap about.
and yesterday susan presented her project “hungry 6 hours.” i think im a pretty terrible person to laugh at her name for it when the cause is so sincere. but then again the people who think shes doing it to save money and food are worse.
oh and the ipod app bubblewrap seems so silly at first butt once you start, you become addicted and you cant stop playing till you beat your score. howeverr the one drawback is at the end when your time is about to end and you keep tapping. and all it takes is one extra tap to go to a different page and your new high score isnt added to your scoreboard. so much for 214 bubbles and a spot on dannys scoreboard stupid app.
even though freshmen year passed by amazingly quick, i still learned a lot. maybe not academically cause i have to admit, i was a pretty shitty student (something i aspire to change soph. year), but i did learn a lot about myself and people. ive learned that sometimes i get in way over my head. i need to stop dreaming so much. sometimes its better to be more realistic. cause with all my dreams and whatever ive lost sight of reality. and it sucks cause sometime you picture all these perfect scenarios but for what? they never happen [i sad mad pessimistic but whatever]. so obviously its ok to dream but how do you learn to limit yourself? when to stop so you dont get so caught up in your dreams and fantasies
there are so many quotes pertaining to people and change but i cant figure out my views on the subject. i think im starting to side more with the idea that people can change and its not that you never really knew them. i used to have so many ideas about my future with my friends and how we would be but it hasnt really worked out as i thought it would. some friends are out of my life now and it really sucks cause they used to be the people that got me through the day. they gave me a reason to go to school. other friends seem like strangers. their actions and words are so foreign. going into highschool i thought “oh these are my friends, if anything ill always have them. i know them and they know me” but thats not really the case. i think highschool changes everyone in some way. and its not always for the better.
well i havent blogged in a super duper long timee. so whats there to talk about. summer!
this summer is such a change from last summer. now we have to take turns staying till 6 and everythings much stricter. but i guess i cant always expect to have things easy. SAT classes basically suck. its more like a time to sleep and do problems. learning isnt really a possibility. talking is so much more fun. and when the class talks with anita and channa its really cool too cause they can relate to me [and bernice] cause they went to stuy too. and having learned that they had 95ish averages, i see hope in the future and ivys as a possibility. oh and im also planning to join a bajillion clubs. during the school year people kept saying how good it is to be on a team and how its even better to start freshmen year i felt pretty low. but whatever! cause channa and anita werent on any and look where they ended up. so im planning to join a whole buncha clubs and go to the club pub fair this year. and try out for cheerleading again! maybe gymnastics?
SO today was pretty routine: get up, rush outta the house, get to kearney, etc. excepttt I HAD GUARD DUTY -dramatic music- actually no, it doesnt deserve any music CAUSE ITS INCREDIBLY BORING. i basically sat in a chair in a corner waiting for parents to come so i could go get their children. luckily danny traded with me during the last hour? i was so happy to trade that i didnt think about why he was nice enough to trade.
bleh so this summer isnt going as planned. i havent ran. i havent tanned. i havent had spectacular amounts of fun. butt i guess its still kinda early? only 1/4 gone!
so the things i still gotta do: TAN, get new clothes somehow, study for bio?[fcuckvvk], practice piano and learn a new song and so much more
OH AND HOLY CRAP STEVIE IS COMING BACK FOR A WEEK SO I DEFINITELY NEED TO SEE HIM <33=))))<33325325653:DD
“That’s what real love amounts to- letting a person be what he really is. Most people love you for who you pretend to be. To keep their love, you keep pretending- performing. You get to love your pretence. It’s true, we’re locked in an image, an act-”
stop acting.”—Jim Morrison (via kari-shma) (via quote-book)
“One of the secrets of getting more done is to make a TO DO List every day, keep it visible, and use it as a guide to action as you go through the day.
i should give this a try”—Jean de La Fontaine (via kari-shma) (via quote-book)
“Everyone has the right to believe and accept what he or she wants, but reality doesn’t discriminate. Reality is not different for different people. Not once has reality excused anyone for good intentions ignorance or stubbornness. Reality shows no mercy, accepts no excuses, and issues no pardons.”—Gary Ryan Blair (via littlemiss) (via quote-book)